Blahnik worthy

Last year, I had an actual boyfriend. (not the same one as the sad ex...)He was the best and the worst all rolled up into one package. He dumped me for a very shallow, superficial reason. It set me back a bit. quite a bit. Over the past few months, he has called a couple times....you're the real deal, the whole package, I don't know how I let you go, blahblahblah. He never did anything to follow up, which made things very easy for me to deal with. Actions speak louder than words, you know. Well, imagine my surprise when he showed up at my door the other day. He wanted in. Wanted to tell me he's back, and is gonna prove to me that he really does want me and he was a fool--more blahblahblah. He looked F I N E fine. Fine or not, I'm unclear as to who the fuck he thinks he is. I guess, really I'm wondering who he thinks I am. Does he really think that I'm just gonna drop everything and open the door ?(and my legs, I think he's hoping) Makes me think he thinks that my life is so empty, I'll jump at the chance to have something. The good part was sooo good. Not just sex. Fun. Lots of long talks. walks. the stuff sappy songs are about. This was not some fly by night thing we had. It was serious. and it hurt my feelings when it ended the way that it did. I cried. it wasn't the action itself that was unforgiveable, I have let go of that, it's the thinking behind it. It made me feel horrible. and he hasn't changed. maybe he has. not my problem anymore. My brother always teases me, saying that I don't give those poor bastards a break. but at 37, I don't really think this is the time to settle. I thought I was mad for a minute, but I'm really not. it's empowering to see my own growth. It felt good not to want him anymore. no anger, just matter o' fact. and as much as i'd like to settle down, settling does not settle down make.
I'm sure Cosmo would disagree saying I should wait to see if he really means it...naaaahhh.
I'd rather do it the Carrie Bradshaw way--go out and buy a hot new pair of shoes, and treat myself to a sushi dinner!!
still no purple mascara, though...
damn, I have a good life